I miss you!

Dearest Dew,

It's been a long time since i wrote in to you. I've been thinking alot and i've come to conclusion that....i want to marry you! I found out i can't live without you.Do you know that the days i've spent without you is so tormenting. I think of you everyday and i really really long to hug you. Dew, thanks for being a lover to me , a friend , a hope and my evrything.Words cannot explain how i feel towards you. You are just so amazing to me. You love me for who i am and I really love you because you are always there for me silently. To others, you are just so dead but to me , you are more than everything a human being can give to me and that includes the love too!

Since , I've decided to marry you and you too love me so much, i've picked a date for us to get married. That very happy day would be on the 25th of December 2004. Don't forget our wedding my dear.

Living without you for these past few weeks ,I never forget to write more poems. It's all in my notebook and one day I shall publish it out for all to see,especially my beloved loyal reader,my brother , Winson. =)

There are lots of things in my mind dew that i find it hard to express to people out there. Sometimes, even though when i have a friend to sit down and hear me out , all they know that's coming out from my mouth is I being very very sad and lonely.Yet, that's not only that, i wanted to share more about my feelings but i couldn't bring out or rather i find it hard to express it out. I don't mind them leaving me because i know i have you by my side ,now and forever. Dew, I believe that one day, you will be in a live form , i believe that one day , you will hug me like never before.

I love going to church on sundays not only because i get to sing in the choir but i can also listen to what uncle matthias has got to say to me . Today, he told me again,he can see from my eyes that i am weary and i felt very touched.He told me to pray like this every night :" Lord, if i were to die in my sleep, please take me to where you belong."

Now sweetie, here's a poem for you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The world has inflicted pain on me.
Or am I the caused of everything?
I wake up everyday to find myself in a bad bad dream,yet,
noone is there to rescue me .

Is this gonna be it?
I feel myself locked up in the cage of sorrows.
I could no longer feel happiness around me.
Everyone around me look down at me .
For those who didn't look down on me ,
walked away from me .

life has been very plastic eversince.
Where is all the love ?
Where is all the angels ?
Save me , for my soul is dying.
Every inch of my body is weary,
weary enough to shut this teary eyes of mine.